“Like what?” he asked.
“Like your family and my family and friends might be offended, like you or I might be judged, like people might avoid us because they’re uncomfortable…”
In the one and half years since my first erotic spicemance–Boss With Benefits–got published, my predictions have come true. With two new summer releases, Going Greek and Private Dancer, I can safely say I’m making great headway being judged. Go me!
The fact is, because I love writing stories that push male/female sexual dynamics further (deeper, harder) I expected I’d be judged because of it. Erotic, defined in Random House Webster’s Dictionary as adj.1. of sexual love. 2. arousing sexual desire.
Promoting erotic romance is not easy. The explicit scenes and raw language contained in erotic fiction rocks boats, and knocks over apple carts.
So why do it? Well, why the hell not? There is erotic romance, laughter, tenderness and hot burning passion in love stories being lived out every single day, all over the world. We meet our matches in many ways. We fall in love in different ways, and sometimes falling in love doesn’t come with a PG rating!
The most surprising twists on this journey have been the good humor of my family, friends and acquaintances. I’ve also gotten to know who I matter to, the ones who embrace not just bits and pieces of me that work for them, but the whole picture; a person who is a wife, mom, friend, neighbor…one who also happens to write wild-hot lustmances!
One neighbor sent me a note of congratulations when I made my first sale. It turns out, she’s a published writer of erotic suspense, too! It jump-started a beautiful, funny and warm friendship.
As a writer, knowing who my audience is means a lot, and if that audience doesn’t include that relation, this in-law, that friend or those acquaintances, then so be it.
Stories of authors whose family members, even their spouses, sabotaging, demeaning and degrading the author’s craft, and books, run rampant in this industry–of SO’s resentful of their mate’s achievements, or family members’ disapproval to the point where they no longer acknowledge the writer’s smallest achievements.
How about the descriptions? “Oh, you write trashy/smut novels?” (This one’s my favorite, because whenever someone comes up to me and describes books about great sex between two committed people as trashy or smut, I instantly feel bad for the poor individual that has to climb into bed with this person every night).
Last spring, parents at a high school attempted to stir up a scandal about an English teacher who wrote erotic fiction under a pen name. These individuals questioned the appropriateness of this teacher even being a teacher. (As I write this, I’m trying hard to keep from laughing). An English teacher that writes fiction on her own personal time?! Can someone please tell me–were the marines called in?
Why does it seem writers would get more respect writing about nesting habits of gerbils, (no disrespect intended to those who do write about that) or ANYTHING other than great sex, love, and happily ever afters. WHY? I don’t know, but I vow to continue hacking away at my art, crafting my words into stories, and appreciating the readers and writers of this sexy category that is erotic romance/erotic fiction.
I’ll go down fighting the sexy, naughty fight, and that’s all I have to say about that.